How To Help Yourself through The Holidays When Mourning

Grief is the internal response to loss, the sadness, sorrow, and pain that seems endless. Mourning is all of those things and more which are public and you share with others. Mourning is healthy. Grief without mourning brings much additional pain and unnecessary suffering, which often shows up intensely on holidays.

The “year of the firsts,” the first Christmas, Hanukkah, Thanksgiving, anniversaries, birthdays, reunions, the first anything without the loved one, are often made even worst when mourners do not assert themselves about what they can and cannot do at each of the firsts. Here are several considerations to facilitate honoring your loved one and yourself at these important times.

1. Make known to your family and/or friends what you can and cannot do. As a primary mourner, make your needs known to all concerned. If necessary, get everyone together at your home well before the holiday, and tell them what you feel about how you wish to celebrate this holiday. Discuss what can be added or deleted from the usual celebration.

If the event was normally held at your home, you may want to eat out, have someone else hold it this year, or have others assume more responsibility to take the load off your shoulders. It’s okay to say no, and as your grief changes over time you can assume old responsibilities or make additional changes.

2. You don’t have to do it the way it was always done. Traditions can change, even if they are many years old. You can even start a new tradition. Whatever you feel will be the most difficult part of the holiday for you can be altered, held at a different time, or left out for this year. Do whatever you feel will reduce unnecessary stress and sadness. Anything left out of one year, can always be brought back the next. Let your faith be your guide, and use it for the strength it provides.

3. There is nothing wrong with reducing the time you spend at events. Regardless of what others do in your family, before each holiday or celebration, tell all concerned what your level of participation will be. You alone know what your energy level is like and what your resources can take without undue strain. Feel free to say you will leave early, not participate in one or more aspects of the celebration, step outside, or come later to the event.

4. Be sure to symbolically honor your deceased loved one. Make it a habit to acknowledge the memory of your loved one at any major family event. Light a candle, make a toast, display a picture or photo album, have the deceased’s favorite dessert or meal, say a prayer, display or give something he/she created, place a flower in a special place at the table, or leave one space at the table empty (have everyone sit in different places). And, it’s okay if tears flow. It is normal, normal, normal.

Forget about perfect. The ideal or perfect holiday celebration seldom exists. Don’t set yourself up by anticipating perfection. At the same time, refuse to let your anticipation tell you the whole scene will be a major source of distress. Diligently manage your anticipation. Keep things simple and focus on the values, beliefs, joy, and wisdom of your loved one. Give yourself a present from your loved one and remember that laughter and a smile are still important parts of life.

Finally, here are nine statements to help you develop a plan for holidays and celebrations. Advanced planning is essential. Fill in each open space. Write as much as you need to.

My Holiday Plan

1. I believe the most difficult part of the coming holiday will be: ___________________.

2. I believe the most difficult people for me to be with will be: _____________________.

3. The most comforting thought about the coming holiday is: ______________________.

4. The people I believe will be the most helpful to me are: ________________________.

5. The words I really need to hear this holiday season are: ________________________.

6. I will celebrate the memory of my loved one on this holiday by: _________________.

7. I will tell my family/friends what I can and cannot do on this holiday by: __________.

8. I will rearrange my participation in the festivities by: __________________________.

9. In order t accomplish my plan, the first thing I will do is: _______________________.

Share your plan, if and when appropriate. With the help and cooperation of all, you and all family and friends can make it through the special days and celebrate a life that has been lived.

Dr. LaGrand is a grief counselor and the author of eight books, the most recent, the popular Love Lives On: Learning from the Extraordinary Encounters of the Bereaved. He is known world-wide for his research on the Extraordinary Experiences of the bereaved (after-death communication phenomena) and is one of the founders of Hospice of the St. Lawrence Valley, Inc. His free monthly ezine website is http://www.extraordinarygriefexperiences.com

Online Paid Surveys As A Hobby

Online paid surveys have long been associated as a source of supplementary income. But few people know that taking free internet paid surveys can become a great hobby as well. As a survey taker or panelist, you are giving your honest feedback or opinions concerning a product or service so that the manufacturers can improve them. In a certain sense, you are also contributing to the better of the society. Take it as a compliment that the companies that offer you online paid surveys value your input and take you seriously.

Online paid surveys work like this. You visit a few free online survey sites and subscribe for their newsletters or sign up as a member of their mailing list. You start off with a few surveys and complete them duly. Before you realize, your email account would experience a deluge of free online surveys. See, the good thing about being on the mailing list is that whenever there is a new free internet paid survey, you get to participate in it.

Not everybody take online paid surveys for money. Like what I have mentioned, some folks like to voice out their opinions and play an active role in changing our environment. If they can influence the manufacturers, perhaps the processed foods we eat can be healthier, the household products we use can be environmentally friendlier, the cars we drive can be less polluting. Online survey companies or market research companies also provide focus group discussions for survey takers. These discussions can be intellectually and sociologically engaging and certainly is a boon to those who loves communication.

Others participate in online paid surveys for other tangible rewards like credits in exchange for discount vouchers, gifts such as household appliances, watches, MP3 players, free dinner coupons, movie tickets, and so on. Stay-at-home mums enjoy taking free internet paid surveys for these perks.

To begin with, online survey sites would ask you for more details about yourself. They want to know you better so that they can match the appropriate online paid surveys available with your profile. Many of the profiling questions have to do with your hobbies and interests. So if you want to enjoy the surveys, be brutally honest. What more befitting it can be than to be offered online surveys that you truthfully can contribute to with valuable input?

Whether you are taking online paid surveys for the money, the gifts or for fun, in order to maximize the potential of this opportunity, you need to be signed up with numerous free internet paid surveys companies. There are two ways to locate survey companies. One is to google “online paid surveys”, “free internet paid surveys” or “online surveys”. This would return millions of results and you probably have to spend a few weeks to screen through one or two dozen companies. Sad to say, some internet paid survey sites are out to con serious genuine income opportunity seekers.

Another way, a shortcut is to purchase a directory list of genuine online paid surveys companies from online survey sites. They have done the necessary research and legwork to source for excellent free internet paid surveys companies. These lists do not cost an arm or a leg which explains why many experienced and newbie survey takers use them.

Taking online paid surveys can be both fun and profitable. Treat it as a hobby and you would enjoy the experience and financial rewards that come with it. To find out more about how you can reap the benefits of online paid surveys, come visit my blog and be fed with useful tips.

This article may be freely reprinted or distributed in its entirety in any ezine, newsletter, blog or website. The author’s name, bio and website links must remain intact and be included with every reproduction.

Davion is a successful webmaster and author. Discover where to find the highest paying free internet paid surveys at his popular blog http://Free-Internet-PaidSurvey.blogspot.com and start earning some extra cash today.

How To Manage Your Credit Card Debt

Everyone loves to lead a comfortable life. However it may not be that easy to purchase a house, vehicle, etc all on your own. As a result, people may be forced to take debts. If one does not manage his finances effectively, these debts can easily go on accumulating and spiral out of control. If the debts just keep on rising one has no other option other than to file for bankruptcy. In order to avoid such a situation, debt management is imperative.

Due to such a situation, debt management counselors are becoming very popular nowadays. People seem to rely on the credit card too much. Buying on credit seems very easy and comfortable but people should realize that they themselves have to then pay off the debt. Paying this debt is aggravated by the fact that one has to now consider the interest rates and payment schedules. A slight delay in paying the installment will further burden you with a fine and a higher interest.

There are a number of such agencies offering debt relief advice. Some of them are non-profit organizations while others charge for their services. But it is very important to check the credentials of the company before approaching it. For this it is essential to conduct a research and weigh the people’s opinions. Some of these agencies offer only debt management while others offer debt counseling too. It is beneficial if the agency is also ready to negotiate with the creditors on your behalf and make the terms and conditions favorable for you.

As soon as you reach the stage when your debts become too much and it becomes tough to keep up with the installments, you will now have to face the bill collection agencies. These collection agencies pester you so much with their phone calls that people generally refrain from answering their phone for fear that it may be a bill collector. This situation can be very taxing to a person. At such times too, the debt management agencies could step in and negotiate with the creditors to revise their terms.

After approaching an agency, the most important part is to strictly follow their advice. They will generally draw out a plan to eliminate your debts and formulate a budget that will help you meet your targets. It is necessary to stay within the limits of the budget at all times. If you can successfully manage this, you will not only eliminate your debts and lead a debt free life but also be in a position to increase your wealth.

Manuel Ramon is the creator of http://getoutofdebtdeals.debtrelief2000.info; a website specialized on debt destroy, resources and articles. More info on debt destroy, debt relief at: debt relief.

The Indeterminacy Of Determinism In Western And African Traditional Thought

Introduction

The first set of philosophers that could be said to have anticipated determinism were the Ancient Greek atomists Leucippus and Democritus. Socrates and Plato in their theory of immortality of the soul also advocated it. According to Leucippus and Democritus, all processes in the world were due to the mechanical interplay of atoms. This theory was not so much supported in their time. Socrates through his disciple, Plato theorized with the myth of Er, the son of Odysseus that an individual soul chooses his destiny at the pre-embodied state.

The concept of Ayanmo (destiny or fate) a popular belief among the Yoruba speaking people in the sub-sahara Africa is strikingly parallel to the foregoing Western conception of desterminism. Roughly speaking, the myth of Ayanmo translates ori-inu (inner head) which is the unconscious element in the human body that explains the choice of whatever a person becomes. In some respect, ayanmo/ori concept seems to picture Freudian ‘unconscious’.
Both the Western and African conceptions of determinism as we shall see in this paper concur that the principal consequence of determinism is the entailment that all future events have already been determined and will necessarily happen.

It can also be argued that both cultures associate determinism with, and rely upon, the ideas of materialism and causality.

Unfortunately, the two belief system about determinism is fundamentally vitiated by a seeming contradiction that man is a responsible moral agent. The concepts of punishment and moral responsibility are natural to man. Man naturally desires freedom to choose by preference. Added to this is the fact that intelligence sets man apart from animals and robots. This very point makes the concept of determinism to suffer some internal tension as man’s existential significance sounds contradictory to the Western and African assumptions of determinism.

Worse still is the African, particularly, the Yoruba strong conviction that sacrifice can alter or obviate the choice of one’s destiny (Gbadebo Dosumu, 1949). These problems almost reduce the concept of determinism to mere absurdity, thereby making it indeterminable. These problems form the thrust of this paper.

Determinism In Western and African Thought
The idea that man and in fact the entire universe is a deterministic system has been espoused in both Western and African thought system. The theory of atomism traceable to Leucippus and Democritus (Russell, 1975, pp 82ff) and in fact, as later expounded by Newtonian physics depicts that the physical matter of the universe operate in fixed, knowable laws. Indeed, man and the entire universe obey the cosmic law of flux and are subject to laws external to them or outside their control. The atoms constitute the smallest particles that form the constituents of any solid body.

According to Leucippus (Russell, p. 87), the full solid or body or matter requires emptiness in order to safeguard movement and multiplicity. Solid bodies fill the vacuum through a mechanical movement outside their control. The atoms that constitute matters are called ‘forms’, ‘natures’, ‘beings’ or the “un-cuttables”. These entities (atoms) have the Eleatic properties of eternity (in time), infinity of number, indestructibility and non-generability in their relation to the qualities, to which they are effectively not susceptible. Man is nothing but a mass of atoms.

In reality, the atomists opine that everything is atoms. Nature itself is merely a perennial and causal play of atoms. The basis of the teaching of Leucippus and Democritus is the deterministic principle that “nothing happens without reason, but everything happens through a reason of necessity and the principle of universal causality” (D. Composta, 1998, p. 87). The earth rests at the center of the universe and does not fall because it is causally and necessarily so determined. Russell (1975, p. 83) sums up the atomists’ argument in the following words:
“… everything is composed of atoms, which are physically, but not geometrically, indivisible; that between the atoms there is empty space; that atoms are indestructible; that they always have been, and always will be, in motion … and their movements are determined outside them”
What we can infer from the foregoing is that the movement of atoms and any matter (Emphasis mine) are determined as they float in motion unconsciously without the ability to control their own movement. This explains man’s action too, since man is an aggregate of atomic particles, his behaviour and actions are not subject to his own personal determination, whims and caprices.

From another perspective, Socrates, a contemporary of Leucippus and Democritus also taught through Plato that the soul of man makes unconscious choice in the pre-existence, at the disembodied state before birth. This thesis is the central theme of his theory of “immortality of the soul”. In many of his Dialogues (Gorgias, Phaedrus, Phaedo) Plato elucidates the destiny of the soul before and after death. Plato’s myth of Er, the son of Odysseus or Armenius explains the procedure through which man’s existence or what he would become is determined by the choice he makes for his next cycle of life. Er died in a battle but his body did not decay several days after his death. His soul sojourned to the supersensible realm where he was made to see how the cycle of life of man is determined by the activities of the three daughters of Necessity, namely, Lauchesis, Clotho and Atropos. Because of its relevance what Er witnessed can be better explained in the words of Plato as follows:

Er saw the soul that had been Orpheus, selecting the life of a swan, because from hatred of the tribe of women, owing to his death at their hands, it was unwilling to be conceived and born of a woman. He saw the soul of Thamyras choosing the life of a nightingale, and he saw a swan changing to the choice of the life of man, and similarly other musical animals. The soul that drew the twentieth lot choose the life of a lion; it was the soul of Ajax, the son of Telemia, which, because it remembered the adjudication of the arms of Achilles, was unwilling to become a man, the next, the soul of Agamemnon, likewise from hatred of the human race because of its sufferings, substituted the life of an eagle. Drawing one of the middle lots the soul of Atlanta caught sight of the great honours attached to an athlete’s life and could not pass them by but snatched at them.

After her, he said, lie the soul of Epeus, the son of Panopeus, entering into the nature of an arts and crafts woman. Far off in the rear he saw the soul of the buffoon Thersites clothing itself in the body of an ape. And it fell out that the soul of Odysseus drew the last lot of all and came to make its choice, and from memory of its former toils having flung away ambition, went about for a long time in quest of the life of an ordinary citizen who minded his own business, and with difficulty found it lying in some corner disregarded by the others… and in like manner, the unjust into wild creatures, the just transformed to tame, and there was every kind of mixture and combination.” (Plato, 1964, Bk x).

The passage adds that after making a choice, an individual soul is made to drink from the water of forgetfulness. This is to zeal or prevent man from knowing what has been determined for him by the lot he has chosen.
Essentially, Plato’s theory attributes the choice of human action to his own choice of the lot or luck that had already been determined for him. In that wise, man is free to choose yet, his existence has already been determined by the choice of his lot; implying that man’s lot or choice of what he becomes in the next life stands outside him because he cannot in anyway influence the lot that had already been decided for him.

It seems difficult to reconcile the sentence: ‘man is free to choose from any lot’ and the entailment: the lot of a man determines whatever he will become in life. Since man is ignorant of the content of his lot, then man does not operate within the modicum of free-choice, meaning that ‘man’ is not a party to his own destiny since it has been determined for him.
Closely related to the Western thought is the Yoruba myth of Ayanmo/Akunleyan determinism, a myth that is usually associated with a verse of the Odu-Ifa literature among the Yoruba. Ipin (allotment) translates Ayanmo or destiny in Yoruba thought. Ayanmo concept derives from Odu, Ika-Ofun. This has been published by Gbadebo Dosumu. As reported by Olufemi Morakinyo (1983, p. 69), I quote this verse of Odu:

Akunleyan eda

Oun ladayeba;

A d’aye tan, oju nkan gbogbo wa

Sugbon eda na ko see pada lo yan omiran;

A fi etutu lo ku.

What was choosen kneeling down,

Is what we find on arrival in this world,

On arrival in this world, we become too impatient,

(too much in a hurry to achieve our potentials)

But it is impossible to go back and choose another;

To prevent deterioration of things is the only course of action left.

This verse explains the act of choice by man of his own “ori” which is necessitated by bending or kneeling down. The choice of ‘ori’ that is made at this point is significant for an individual’s choice of later life. It also explains that once a choice has been made, it becomes irrevocable. As earlier published by Wande Abimbola (1975, pp. 178 - 207), the myth of Ayanmo like the myth of “Eri” argues that before coming to this life (aye) from heaven (orun) an individual has the privilege of choosing an “ori” from the store-house of Ajala, an appointed servant of Olodumare (God) who is sadled with the responsibility of building “ori”. No individual is competent to know the content of “ori” he has choosen. It is Ajala, a senior orisa (deity) who knows all and he moulds ori daily as that is his main assignment. It is evident from the myth of Ayanmo/ “ipin” that the choice of an individual’s ori plays critical role in the series of events in each person’s life.

The following features seem to be common to both the Western and African conception of determinism, albeit: that the foundation for many of the events that would occur in an individual life has already been laid before him; that an individual is responsible for the choice of his own destiny and once a choice has been made, it is irrevocably zealed. It is pertinent to ask at this juncture - is man a free moral agent? Since his actions have been determined can it be said that man is a responsible being? If man is not responsible for his actions, what is the relevance of the concept of ‘responsibility’, ‘punishment’ and ‘reward’? Such questions would continue to swell if we consider the implications of the concept of determinism in both Western and African thought as espoused in this paper. However, of more challenging and indeterminable is the puzzle of determining determinism within the context of the very nature of man.

Naturally, certain traits of man makes the very concept of determinism preposterous and absurd. Without recourse to the theory of ‘free-will’ or ‘incompatibilism’, ‘man’ seems to be naturally endowed with freedom in his nature as an intelligent existent. To have such natural capacity is to act freely and to have what it takes to act freely. Consequently, what a man does is up to himself. He has a plurality of alternatives and he determines which course of action to pursue. If this argument holds, then, determinism in whatever version is false as it contradicts the very essence of man. The danger of emphasizing determinism in any thought system is a repudiation of chance events and of course, indeterminism. The determinists’ argument is strictly that everything has a cause, and something happening uncaused to them is impossible. My claim boils down to this fact, namely, if the future was imbedded in the past, no new information would be introduced into the world and man would not be classified as being capable of any creative or imaginative thought.

As a matter of fact, the discovery of Edward Lorenz (1961) of the theory of ‘chaos’ and ‘probability’ serves as a logical polemic against Newtonian physics in considering the behaviour of atomic systems. In what follows, I consider it relevant to assess determinism from the point of the theory of ‘chaos’ and ‘probability’.

Determinism, Chaos and Probability
The word ‘chaos’ according to Houghton (Houghton, 1994, p. 77) is used as a technical term to describe a system whose behaviour is extremely “dependent on the initial conditions from which the system started - so dependent in fact, that after a short time it becomes essentially unpredictable. The point Houghton seems to make by his claim can better be understood by the illustration with a ’simple pendulum’. For example, for a bob swinging around in a circle at the end of a string, the frequency of a natural oscillation (the frequency with which the bob swings when allow to swing freely) is given by a simple expression, namely, that the behaviour of the pendulum is regular and predictable and not dependent on the precise way the driving force is applied. But at other periods close to resonance (when the forcing frequency equals the natural frequency of oscillation), the pedullum behaves in a chaotic way; it is then extremely sensitive to minute variations in the driving force.

Suppose that at some stage of the motion very precise details are available of the motion of the bob and the forcing motion, can the bob subsequent motion be predicted? To begin with, there would be good correspondence between predictability and observation. But as time goes on, the predictability and the observation will diverge, the time before substantial divergence occurs being called the predictability horizon. If the initial conditions are more accurately defined, the predictability horizon will move away. Roughly speaking, the predictability horizon increases proportionally to the number of decimal places in the definition of the initial conditions.
It is instructive to note here that the foregoing allusion to the theory of chaos has serious implications for determinism, particularly, Newtonian determinism. If quantum mechanics is also included in our description of events, as soon as the specification of the initial conditions required for prediction involves details, say, of the movement of individual electrons, the Heisenberg (1989, p. 220) ‘uncertainty principle’ becomes relevant. We come up against an inability not only in practice but in principle to specify with adequate precision the initial conditions. This means that prediction of the future behaviour of very many large scale systems, even for a relatively short time ahead, also becomes impossible in principle.

In sum, it has been argued that chaos and probability play a large part in our modern scientific description, be it in physics or biology, and our daily lives are filled with chance occurrences. We are bombarded with statistics about the probabilities of being born with various defects, of particular sorts of crimes, of death from various causes and so forth. In fact, Richard Dawkins’ hunch strengthens the above claim that chance processes have provided a firm basis for Darwinian evolution (Dawkins, 1986, p. 78). In a similar vein, Donald Mackay (1978, pp 110 - 117) and Arthur Peacocks (1979, pp. 74 - 79) submit that chance and probability, although properly part of a scientific description, are not causes of events any more than any other scientific descriptions or laws can be said to have causal properties. Chaos too does not make things happen.

It can be safely concluded that the scientist’s capacity to predict the future is very much more limited than we think.

The theory of chaos, I consider to be a reasonable interpolation to our discussion of the indeterminacy of determinism as the theory provides a mechanism that allows for free will within a world seems to be governed by deterministic laws. Thus, inherent in determinism itself is freedom that cannot be detarched from it. And more importantly, it can be said that there are events which do not correspond with determinism and therefore have no cause. The point is in contradistinction to the determinist’s assumption that every event, including human cognition and action, is causally determined by an unbroken chain of prior occurrences since no mysterious miracles or wholly random events occur. But this is not the case. Taken at face value, determinism is saying that man is an irresponsible moral agent.

Conclusion
Among philosophers and psychologists even across cultures, determinism is a re-current topic and has faced a spate of criticisms. Debates about this subject-matter will remain open-ended. It is expedient to add that indeterminism is a fundamental quality of nature. As the existentialist philosophers would argue, man finds himself thrown into this world, and throughout his life, is nothing else but what he makes of himself. As his destiny lies in his hands, he is free to live his life in whatever way he chooses (Satre, J. P. 1948). This very nature of man is incompatible with the central teaching of determinism, whatever its form. Therefore, Western and African conceptions of determinism is beset by the problem of reconciling the nature and essence of man with the central theme of determinism.
References

Abimbola, W., Ifa, An Exposition of Ifa Literary Corpus, Ibadan O. U. . 1976.
Composta, D. History of Ancient Philosophy, Urbania University Press, Vatican, Italy, 1988.

Dawkins, R. The Blind Watchmaker, Longman, London, 1986.

Dosunmu, G. (C. 1949) Typescript, n. d.

Gleick, J., Chaos Heinemann, London, 1988.
Houghton, J. Global Warning: The Complete Briefing, Lion Publishing, London, 1994.

Lozenz, E. N. The Essence of Chaos, University of Washington Press, 1993.
Mackay, D. Science, Chance and Providence, Oxford University Press, London, 1978.

Makinde, M. A. “Immortality of The Soul and The Yoruba Theory of Seven Heavens” in Journal of Cultures and Ideas, Vol. 1., No. 1., Dec. 1983.
Morakinyo, O. A. Methodological Consideration of Cross-Cultural Research: The Problems and Implications of Ethnographic Translation (African J. Behav. Sc. 1:P 41 - 49.

Plato, The Republic, Book x. See also F. M. Conford: The Republic of Plato, New York, Oxford University Press, 1966.

Russell, B. History of Western Philosophy, George Allen and Unwin Ltd., 1975.
Satre, J. P. Existentialism and Humanism (Translated with Introduction by Philip Mairet) London, Methuen Ltd., 1978, First Published in English in 1948.
Tritton, D. “Chaos in The Swing of Pendulum” in New Scientists, Lion Publ., London, 1986.

BY

Z. B. OGUNDARE,

DEPARTMENT OF PHILOSOPHY,
UNIVERSITY OF ADO-EKITI, NIGERIA in Partnership with
In partnership with
London Academy for Higher Education.

Project Team Building And Morale

“You have lost your subject when you have lost his inclination; you are to preside over the minds, not the bodies of men. The soul is the essence of a man; and you cannot have the true man against his inclination.”
— Sir Walter Raleigh.

Check your project. Does your staff exhibit the characteristics of high morale?
1. You do not encounter small groups of people who scatter furtively when approached.
2. Lateness and absenteeism do not interfere with the organizational program.
3. Better qualified people fill vacant positions.
4. The informal social network quickly absorbs new recruits.
5. Decisions to hire, fire, promote or demote are usually unanimous among those consulted.
6. Dismissals and demotions are rare.
7. Supervisors are well acquainted with their staff and vice versa.
8. The distribution of pay and privileges is taken for granted.
9. Organizational ceremonies are well attended.
10. You are seldom called upon by subordinates to help maintain their authority.
11. Staff who get involved in organizational conflicts are apologetic, not complacent.
12. Both parties welcome you in conflict situations.
Yet, morale shouldn’t be confused with happiness. If your organization subscribes to the above-mentioned high morale factors, they accept the goals, obey rules and participate in organizational life.
Consider the following morale-building factors…

REWARD AND PUNISHMENT
Rewards such as pay, prestige and privileges directly affect morale. The puzzle is to reward the most productive staff, without lowering the morale of others. After all, it’s the employees’ conception of justice that determines whether a group’s reward system works. The individual’s expectations determine whether they perceive treatment to be just or unjust. For this reason, consider the following guidelines for creating a just system of reward and punishment:

There must be ample respect for the equality of peer equals. In cases where the equal treatment of equals presents a logistics problem - as in the case of a limited number of free tickets to the ball game - the allocation should be made by chance. Lots may be drawn or a decision can be arrived at through rotation.

Avoid paying supervisors less than their subordinates. Such incongruities reduce morale.

Promises made must be promises kept. The wise manager will spell out a promise for promotion in writing or at the very least in front of a witness. The performance of a promise should be as meticulously carried out - no more and no less than was originally discussed.

Every manager should observe due process. No accusation or claim against an employee should ever be acted upon without hearing the employee’s side of the story, allowing him or her to examine the evidence and to obtain evidence on their own behalf.

AVOID STAFF RATING BLUNDERS
Unfortunately, errors in evaluation do occur with disturbing regularity and consequences. Common causes include:

The illusion of consistency - Individuals who have an unblemished track record one year are automatically assumed to have displayed similar performance the following year.

Masking an individual’s performance - In teamwork situations, individual contributions become difficult to measure.

Masking of individual performance by intermediate supervisors - Intermediate supervisors may be driven to inaccurately report the conduct of subordinates for two reasons:

(a) An individual with an outstanding track record may be lost by promotion or transfer, or may steal some of the credit due to the supervisor.
(b) A poorly performing individual may not be accurately reported by his superior for fear of repercussions of inadequate supervision.

Defects of rating systems - Supervisors tend to give higher ratings to more compliant subordinates. To avoid this bias, encourage the individual’s peers and subordinates to submit performance ratings as well.

Invisible performances - Most intricate organizational programs include several activities not visible from the top, and some activities only visible to those individuals directly involved in them. Managers should not assume that no news is good news. Solid information should be collected concerning the performance of an activity for which a manager is responsible.

DEVELOP YOUR STAFF

Proper training of recruits encompasses not only the acquisition of specific skills. Also required are new images, social relationships and moral values.
The importance of proper training is often overlooked. As a result, recruits leave soon after joining. The manager who wishes to make a dramatic improvement in organizational effectiveness should consider initiating a strong training program. The actual training program should be structured in an unrushed manner in order to gain maximum benefits.

CURTAILING CONFLICT

Organizational conflict leaves scars in more places than solely on those individuals directly involved with the conflict. When conflicts reach the stage of one party trying to destroy the other, it’s too late for the manager to salvage much of anything. If the manager plays the role of judge in a conflict, he or she will probably get little thanks from the winning party, while the losing party will attribute the manager’s decision to bias or stupidity. If a manager works hard at isolating any developing problem before it reaches a conflict stage, success will be easier to attain.

Harry Mingail’s Project Management seminars are interactive and entertaining, and customized to the unique needs of participants.

http://www.cmctraining.org/toolkit_pm.asp

Anger Management For The Teen Who Knows It All

Teens now a day seem to know everything. Heck they think we just exist for the shear pleasure of cooking them their meals and taking them where they need to go. Seems more than not, they love to talk back and yell. Why not yell they feel the louder they yell the more we will hear them and then they get mad when we do not understand and then they walk out stomping or worse, cussing!

Teens usually fly of the handle when they have no patience with us, or they have a disagreement with their curfew. Teens have every thing going with them, from hormones, to girl or boy friends to just about anything else if they look at them wrong.

By telling them you will not talk to them when they are yelling is a good way to start. Tell them that nothing is every solved with yelling and tell them you know they would want to come to a better resolved for the problems, so talk it over with them. Sit, yes that’s right moms and dads, sit get out of the fast lane and take time! By sitting down, and listening to your teen, you will be surprised that they are caught off guard. Tell them you are all ears and that you want to resolve the problem.

If the anger is there because you will not let them go out and stay late, compromise with them. Tell them you will let them, if they will start to practice talking things out and not yelling at it all and becoming angry. But also in that tell them they will have consequences if they do not abide by the new decision, for example if you allow them an extra hour, and they come home later, tell them you will reduce the next time. But be sure to tell them ahead of time.

You will be surprised that teens are all to willing to negotiate. You need to learn how to be an auctioneer…bargain, start small and then go from there. By talking and sitting, yes sitting with your teen you will find that the anger will diminish over time.

Author is Michele Rogers, owner of http://www.lilyputtshomedecor.com Lilyputts Home Decor, and http://www.backyardfancy.com Backyard Fancy. Both online stores feature home and back yard decor and both have blogs where you can read tips on decor and view featured items. Please visit Backyard Fancy and Lilyputts Home Decor for descriptions and product presentations. Please, keep intact all author information.

Ways To Increase Your Savings And Eliminate Debts

People, who have fallen into debts, suddenly find their debts increasing drastically. They need to effectively manage their finances to eliminate these debts or else they will fall deeper and deeper into this debt pit. Some of the ways that may assist you in paying off the debts are as follows:

Buying On Impulse
People just buy what they fancy even if they may not require the items. These costs ultimately add up to a significant amount at the end of the year. In order to optimize ones savings, people should be very clear about what they need and avoid unnecessary expenses.

Phones
The expenses on phone calls drain away a lot of ones money. People should be on the lookout for more economical cell phone schemes. One should try to restrict oneself to having just one phone, either a cell phone or a house phone connection. If the monthly bills are rising drastically, keep a check on your call duration.

High End Vehicles
Everyone loves to own a fancy vehicle but one should see the practical side too. Always check the mileage, fuel consumption, repair, maintenance and other costs. When saving money is of prime concern, it may be sensible to opt for a cheaper more fuel efficient vehicle.

Discount Coupons
Always be on the lookout for shop sales, discount periods and shops giving discount coupons. These save a lot of money in the long run. Also try to avail of membership offers and saving clubs when available in certain big stores.

Branded goods
Avoid purchasing branded articles especially clothes and other accessories. These goods are priced exorbitantly as a major chunk of the cost is associated with the brand name. Buying lesser known products will help you to save a lot more cash.

Dining Out
Restaurants and hotels charge very heavily for meals. Hence try to reserve these hotel meals only for special occasions.

Weekly Entertainment
Entertainment provides a way to release the pent up stress. However to avoid burning a hole in your pocket try cheaper means like rent out a movie instead of visiting a cinema, etc. Also try the free festivals, concerts, etc.

Vices
Vices are addictive and generally costly. Try cutting down or gradually stopping your drinking alcohol, smoking, gambling, etc. The amount of money saved in the process will certainly surprise you.

Incorrect Bills
Always scrutinize your bills before paying them. This will ensure that there are no mistakes and you do not pay any excess or for items not purchased.

Mortgage payments
Always be punctual while paying your mortgage charges. Try to pay more than the required minimum. This will ensure you get rid of the debt at the earliest.

Manuel Ramon has created http://agencycollectiondebtdeals.debtrelief2000.info; a website specialized on creditcard debt, resources and articles. More info on credit card debt, debt management at: debt management.

Construction Job Market In 2007

Construction industry is related to the building and assembling of any structure on site. Many people think of construction as one thing, but it’s a series of tasks which combine to make one project. In a normal construction project, there is a project manager which oversees the specific operation, as well as subcontractors like painters and carpenters as well as internal employees. The whole operation is headed by someone titled the construction manager.

There are three main types of construction: building construction, residential construction, and heavy/highway construction. Building construction refers to adding another structure to real property. The majority of building construction is small projects like renovating or adding a room in an already existing house. These tend to be smaller projects than the other two. Residential construction refers to a private family finding construction companies to build their own house from the ground up or even building their own houses and subcontracting people to help out. Heavy/highway construction projects are usually the biggest and headed government agencies either at the local or national level.

Since it’s only been three months into the year, it’s safe to say that the job market of the construction industry has not experienced heavy fluctuations so far. However, residential construction has decreased after a boom that lasted about three years. In the duration of the past three years, it was popular for families to build a house after purchasing a piece of land. Other than regulations that must be followed in each specific state and district, each family has relative freedom in choosing many aspects of their new home. However, this didn’t last and in January experts came out with statements in January that residential construction job market was on the fall.

Non-residential markets, however, is on the rise. The job market is enjoying double digit growth and experts predict that this will last throughout the entirely of the year. However, a slowdown may occur as well due to project delays resulting from high materials prices and labor costs resulting from high demand, or if the economic outlook worsens. Gas and oil prices are directly correlated to the price of materials, many of them which are imported.

If you’re currently not involved in the construction market but has interested in getting started, then you should look into various areas connected to it like construction accounting, construction estimating, and project management. It’s important to know that there are various ways to obtain help, and those include not only people but construction estimating software. Both provide a great source of aid and can make every difference in the world.

Natalie Aranda is a freelance writer. If you’re currently not involved in the construction market but has interested in getting started, then you should look into various areas connected to it like construction accounting, construction estimating, and project management. It’s important to know that there are various ways to obtain help, and those include not only people but construction estimating software Both provide a great source of aid and can make every difference in the world.

Best Places To Play Bingo In Oklahoma

Bingo is a fun, family-oriented game which continues to grow in popularity throughout the world. It is a game of chance, and randomly-drawn numbers are matched to the same numbers appearing on a bingo card. The winner is the first player to have the drawn numbers form a specified pattern on their card (lines can be made horizontally, vertically, or diagonally). When this happens, the player yells out, “Bingo!” to inform others of their win.

In many countries, Bingo is used as a form of legalized gambling. In the United States, numerous bingo halls are available to play at, and states like Oklahoma often locate these facilities next to more traditional casinos.

If you happen to find yourself in Oklahoma, you should certainly visit one of their many bingo halls and play a few games. The action is fast-paced, and all sorts of great prizes are up for grabs (including money and cars at some of the larger facilities). In fact, I’ve complied a short list of some of the better places to play in the state.

Okemah, Oklahoma - Located in Central Oklahoma, Okemah is the county seat of Okfuskee County. It is the birthplace of folk music legend Woody Guthrie (if you visit in July, be sure to check out the festival dedicated to his memory). In the Indian language, the word Okemah means “things up high.” And if you’re not in a hurry, you might also want to check out Lake Okemah, which is one of the most well-managed lakes in the state (and since Oklahoma is “America’s Frontier Lake State,” that’s really saying something).

There are three major centers for bingo in the city. The first is Okemah Bingo and Casino, located at 1100 South Woody Guthrie Street. Second, there’s The Okemah Gaming Center, which offers a variety of slot machines as well as bingo. It can be found just off of Interstate 40. Speaking of Interstate 40, that’s where the third facility can also be found. It’s called the Thlopthlocco Tribal Town Casino, and it’s just off of Exit 227.

Concho, Oklahoma - A rural unincorporated community, Concho is in Canadian County and can be found just north of the Concho Indian School. While there’s not much to see in the small community of Concho, there’s some excellent bingo and gambling to be found at the Lucky Star Casino, located on 7777 North Highway 81.

Turpin, Oklahoma - Another small community which offers excellent bingo opportunities, Turpin is located in Beaver County. While there’s not much in the way of shopping or dining, fans of history may be interested in the Turpin Grain Elevator which is included in the National Register of Historic Places.

Bingo is available at State Line Bingo, which is located on Highway 83 South. Games are available every Tuesday through Saturday starting at 5:30 pm.

Haileyville, Oklahoma - Located in Pittsburg County, Haileyville has a population of around 900. Be careful when traveling to the bingo hall, however, as the town’s main source of income comes from speeding fines.

In actuality, this community doesn’t have an actual bingo hall. Instead, games are held at the Haileyville Fire Department, which is located at 110 Main Street. This may sound a bit odd, but it’s perfect for those who want to make new friends and sample of slice of small-town life.

While the places I’ve listed here may sound small and unimportant, that shouldn’t stop you from giving them a try. The people of Oklahoma are warm and generous, and the residents of these smaller communities are especially hospitable. Besides, there’s often less competition, so that could possibly add up to more wins (and more prizes) for you.

Okemah, Oklahoma Bingo
Concho, OK Bingo
Turpin, Oklahoma Bingo

Include The Whole Family On Home Improvements

With our busy schedules today we should use the whole family when it comes to projects for the home and back yard. By using our kids to help, it will make the projects seem quicker and best of all it’s a family affair!

You will be surprised at how young kids are willing to help. Seems the younger they are the more helpful they are! If you are redoing a back yard for a party that requires cleaning and moved furniture and other items, even though you can carry a chair by yourself, why not include the kids help. Tell them you want them to help you move it to another location. By using the family’s help you may think they will get in your way, at times that may be true, but if you plan ahead you will find there is nothing a whole family can accomplish.

Kids you will find are helpful in many ways. They can fetch paper bags, or trash sacks. Give them easy accomplishable task to do. By giving them a task that they can accomplish there is a lot of pride that goes with that. Most little ones love to brag, so if it’s a big job, include them in helping you. While you are indoors remodeling you may want to have help with destruction work, like taking up tiles. Be sure they have protective gloves if it is ceramic tile, and possibly safety goggles.

In using the whole family on home improvements you will find that it brings a special bonding to the family and most of all your jobs will get done a lot faster

Author is Michele Rogers, owner of http://www.lilyputtshomedecor.com Lilyputts Home Decor, and http://www.backyardfancy.com Backyard Fancy. Both online stores feature home and back yard decor and both have blogs where you can read tips on decor and view featured items. Please visit Backyard Fancy and Lilyputts Home Decor for descriptions and product presentations. Please, keep intact all author information.