After many lost goals, I am always left wondering why I am constantly setting goals and not achieving most of them. You might be just like me. Always excited at setting goals. We write it down, make it measurable, specific and all that. Then we just put them away in a drawer somewhere or let it lie in the pages of our journal and before you know it a year has past. Our goals totally forgotten.

I was looking at how to build a lasting relationship with my love when I saw many parallels between building a strong loving relationship and goal getting. Let me count the ways….

1. Stick to one or very few

If you are the kind that is prone to being a two timing lover, you would know that you can’t juggle too many relationships and expect all of them to go well. Somewhere along the way, some of these relationships have to be sacrificed. The best of loving relationships is confined to between two individuals, not more.

Likewise, don’t set too many big goals. Just stick to few but very important ones and focus on building relationship with them.

2. The relationship must be nurturing

Everybody wants to be with a partner that brings out the best in him/her. A loving relationship is one that nurtures each partner.

Think about your goals. Does it really bring out the best in you? Some of us set goals that are not really in line with our value system. This will create a lot of internal conflict and we will just end up being miserable trying to achieve these goals. There are also others who set goals for the sake of another but not really what he/she wants. Again, internal conflict will bring a lot of unnecessary stress and tension into ones life.

Choose a goal that is motivational and in line with your value system. The goal itself must give you a sense of purpose in life and spur you to live your life to the fullest.

3. Constant communication is vital

A loving relationship cannot be build based on the initial passion and romance only. It takes a lot of constant communication, especially through the rough times.

Do the same with your goals. Always keep your goals in close view. If you have written it in the pages of your journal, review it daily, weekly or monthly. Whatever the frequency, keep going back to your written goals. Better still, have it printed and stick it by your full length mirror or in the bathroom and you cannot not notice it. Today, we even have software programs that help us remind ourselves of the goals we have set. Go get these types of software and let it do the reminding for you. This is especially important when the going gets tough and doubts sets in.

4. Speak well of your goals

I noticed that people in a loving relationship always speaks well of their partner to others. So do the same with your goals. Talk about your goals to others in your social network. Tell them how excited you are in trying to achieve these goals. Tell them how having that one goal have changed your life. Tell them how it is going to be when you achieve your goals. Just tell them with full positive energy. Who knows, you might just inspire them to go after their own goals.

5. Get intimate with your goals

Intimacy is an essential part of a loving relationship. Without intimacy, it would have been no different from a friendship. How do you get intimate with your goals?

Visualize!

Take time out each day to visualize yourself having achieved your goals. How would you feel? Ecstatic? Of course! Hold on to this powerful feeling and let it drive you each day towards your goals.

6. Relationship takes time

Nothing strong can be built overnight. I have not come across a couple in a very strong relationship that did not take years to develop.

Assess the time frame for your goals. Are you being too impatient? Did you set an unrealistic time line for your goals? Doing so will only create a lot of stress in your life and imbibe a sense of failure in you. These are not productive emotional states at all. If you are constantly communicating with your goals, then assess also the time you have set to achieve them. Adjust when necessary. But don’t use it as an excuse to take it easy. If a goal takes forever to achieve, it is not worth going after.

7. Stick with it

The best of relationships are those that have survived some rough times. It adds depth to the relationship and makes it worth the while to stay in the relationship.

Going after your goals can get rough at times. These are nothing but tests that life has put to you only to check if you really deserve to get it. The bigger the goals, the greater the test is likely going to be. Stick with it and living your dreams will be a much sweeter experience.

Dean Shams is the founder of The Achievers’ Circle, a powerful peer-to-peer success coaching system. His life mission is to invite every man, woman, child and organization onto the path of self improvement.

http://www.successatgoalsetting.com
http://www.ultimatesuccessformula.net