I think all of us have asked the same questions. How do all these inventions work? Microwave over; refrigerator; television; radio; clocks; toaster; vehicles; and the list goes on and on. What would you do without your Blackberry, your cell phone or your computer? Have any idea how the “panic button”works?

For over ten years, I worked for a large world-wide engineering company, which employed over 30,000 employees. We did work for all the big boys and girls all over the world including; Los Alamos Scientific Labs; Sandia National Labs; large aircraft builders; universities; government agencies such as Interior and NASA; National Lightning Center; all the military services and governments around the world, etc. Additionally, EG&G manufactured parts and equipment for National Hurricane Center; Geological Survey and our technicians worked on the communications systems on Air Force One.

I don\’t consider myself a technical-minded person, but as a technician for over ten years, I worked on some really interesting projects while with the company until I was laid off. Steel, epoxy, foam, washers, nuts and bolts don\’t to much by themselves…but, when you put them all together, you have a piece of equipment that can do great things.

During the many years I worked there, it was amazing to me, how many important things the company did for mankind and for the nation. We designed and manufactured proto-type things…things that had never been done before. That\’s why anyone dealing with EG&G, would have to have deep pockets and/or a blank checkbook!

* Flood control: You may remember the severe and destructive floods that happened all along the Mississippi River valley a few years ago. I liked working on this project, because it was for ordinary people, and something everyone can understand. EG&G manufactured about 130 rain gages, to help control flooding in the Mississippi river and elsewhere.

The rain gages were aluminum tubes, which stood about 8 feet tall. About 5 feet of the tube would be buried in the ground at its location. At the top of the rain gage, was a little bucket to collect rain. When the bucket was full of rain, it was emptied by remote-control by some computer, probably hundreds of miles away, and the process of collecting rain would begin again. Engineers and scientists could find out where there was the most rainfall, and build dams and diversion channels to control the flooding. Isn\’t this neat?

* Classified parts: Many of the things we worked on were classified, and so was this piece for Los Alamos Scientific Labs, which I remember was my favorite job to work on. I saw the piece of copper when it came in to make this piece, and it looked like copper…all corroded, rough edges and dirty. But, when this piece of copper was machined and polished, it looked like a brand new, shiny, penny…and it measured about 3 feet in diameter; by 4 inches thick; and weighed about 225 pounds!
It was tapered along the edges, and it looked like a shiny, copper UFO!

The only thing we knew about this piece, was it would have a short shelf-life at Los Alamos, as engineers were to blow this piece up, and take photographs and the data from its demise, etc.

* Antenna: One of the biggest projects I worked on, was a 40 million dollar contract for the U.S. Navy. The research and development on this project took over five years. When assembled, this monster antenna would stand about 25 stories tall, and resembled an upside down ice cream cone…with the narrow end at the bottom and the wide end at the top. It contained over 2,000 housings of resistors and over 60,000 potted resistors.

Hurricane Katrina taught us all, just how important communications is during a national tragedy, and crucial especially during wartime. This antenna was built to simulate nuclear explosions and the effect they would have on communications systems on ships at sea! (EMP-Electro-magnectic pulse)

* * *

EG&G ceased to exist in Albuquerque, New Mexico, where I live, and it was a victim of the big fish eating the little fish…in this case Honeywell eating the little fish, etc. After EG&G, I got a job at a plastics manufacturing company, that made parts for everything from sewing machines to computers, etc. I was always wondering how all these parts were made, and now I got my chance. I think the reader can relate to this story, because I think this industry in the back-bone of our society.

The process of making plastic parts, is called the injection-molding process, and for those of you who have never seen this process in action, I\’ll try to briefly describe it for you. So, how can an alarm clock or calculator be sold for only five dollars and a profit be made? Answer: Because this process is FAST…very FAST…and that keeps the costs down!

Almost all of the parts made with this process are made in about 20 seconds! The mouse you\’re probably holding in your hand right now, was probably made someplace in only 20 seconds. Many of these parts are assembled out of the country, which makes them affordable to the average consumer.

Engineers have developed these enormous machines, which handle enormous pressures to move the melted plastic and cooling systems throughout the machine. After a part is made in only 20 seconds, most are cool to the touch and can be packaged, if nothing else has to be done to the part, etc. Even if the part is a small as a dime, or as large as a television back…it is still made on only 20 seconds.

Many molds have multiple cavities, so that many parts are the made at the same time. Example; Smoke alarms are made six at a time, and every 20 seconds makes 18 a minute; and about 1,000 an hour and 24,000 for a 24 hour period…and that\’s gitty-up for a machine! During the three years I worked in this industry, I saw everything made from a 24″ television back and front…to dentures!
This is a very fast process, and this is one way the cost of products are kept low. Amazing!

Excuse me, Jer…but shouldn\’t the title of this article be, “Four out of five people have trouble with fractions?”

Now, the reader can see why I\’m not an engineer or an accountant…and I\’m not good with numbers at all. Almost everything we use today, has the finger prints of an engineer on it, and I don\’t think engineers get the credit or recognition they deserve!

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Copyright; Jerry L. Aragon (The Humor Doctor) 2007