Are you looking in the wrong direction to find out if your spouse is cheating?

When you begin to suspect your other half is having an affair, more often than not your otherwise logical and sensible approach to life, can go straight out the window.

We start to freely allow our overwhelming emotions to take the driving seat, and toss out our calm and collected way of thinking.

The thought, and often the mere anticipation of being hurt emotionally blurs our vision. The mere possibility of having the trust in the relationship broken is initially, far too much to take.

Don’t worry, as you are not alone in this.

But this brings along a pitfall, which far too many people fall into and don’t even realize it.

When you are overcome with emotion at being suspicious of your spouse you get trapped into what I call the “elusive syndrome”.

Let me explain. If you suspect your partner of having an affair, what are you desperate for at this very moment? The answer is probably to find out the truth!

However, what you may not realize is that while you genuinely DO want to know the truth, deep down you are scared to be faced with it.

As confusing as it may seem, in many cases, at least at the start it actually is easier for you to cope with the horrid feelings of being suspicious about your husband or wife, rather than having to deal with the devastation of knowing it’s true.

So while you yearn for the truth, the fear of “facing” it, makes you slip into the elusive syndrome.

And what exactly does that mean? Simply put, you become somewhat blind and elusive to the obvious signs of cheating that your spouse may be displaying everyday…and instead you spend your time and energy trying to look for clues that are not readily available or harder to find.

But why might you do this? Simply because, the longer you ignore the evidence that you already have, and carry on your frantic search for the more elusive evidence, you end up allowing yourself to stay in a state of suspicion.

And as I said before, as strange as it might seem, as humans our minds are hard-wired to protect us from pain.

Even the mere act of postponing the pain, is our way to protect us for as long as possible.

So my advice to you would be to aware of the “elusive syndrome”, and start to observe and look for the clues right under your nose.

Watch for the changes in your spouses’ behavior that you see while you’re together, rather than searching for clues of when they are away from you.

Eventually of course, you will want to know what’s taking place in your absence, but a good starting point is being more observant when you are together.

To learn how to use proven shortcuts, visit Tim Denio’s site and find out if your spouse is cheating on you.

Are men the only “villians” in the infidelity game? Nope!

A reported 50% increase in adultery among woman, tells us that wives and girlfriends are fast joining the “cheating hearts” club.

So what’s the scoop? Are more women really partaking of the same adulterous rendezvous’ that they have long condemned males for? Yes, they are. Their reasons for cheating may be very different but they are cheating!

Often men cheat on their wives purely for the joy of sex. They aren’t getting enough at home, so, they go for the “married but not getting any - no strings attached” routine. Pure, sexual gratification is really all they are looking for. They have absolutely desire to change their current situation or disrupt their family. Considering sex to be a natural male, physical “need” and disassociating it from “love” can justify cheating for a man.

For women on the other hand, things are not quite so simple. They are more likely to misinterpret the intimacy of sex with another as emotional closeness, something they feel they are lacking with their husband.

Today’s busy families seldom connect for more than a few minutes out of each day. The lack of communication between spouses can make it very easy for a woman to feel neglected or taken for granted.

Men rarely leave their wives for their mistresses because there is no emotional involvement on their part. It’s just sex. Women however, thrive on emotion and crave intimacy. They are much more likely to leave their current partner for what they believe to be “true love”. Often, they discover too late that their sexual partner had no desire for a long term relationship in the first place. Men, just sex - remember?

Couples need to take time out each day to talk to each other and listen, really listen. People rarely do that anymore. Often the signs of a disintegrating relationship are right under our noses but we have stopped looking at each other so we don’t notice until it’s too late.

Think about it. You spend eight hours a day, everyday with a flirting co-worker while at best, you spend maybe one hour alone with your spouse after a busy day. And what are two of you doing during that hour?

Remote control in one hand and scratching with the other, the husband is thinking about that “hot” secretary he “banged” during his lunch break today because his wife was too tired to put out last night. No big deal.

And the wife? Based on feelings of false euphoria, she has made the decision to “work late” with her co-worker tomorrow. He makes her feel sexy and desirable.

What a waste!

It’s 6 PM and there is no supper on the table…guess who’s cheating now?

Cindy English is the author and publisher of an intriguing new site: “Our Cheating Ways“…unpardonable sin or just human nature? Join the debate!

Visit her other sites:
Beach Wedding Themes - Beach wedding themes full of fun, fantasy and romance!
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How to tell if your spouse is cheating on you? Unfortunately that is something that I know about from experience, but like most people I found out about it too late. There are many ways to tell if your spouse is cheating and most of them will work just as well for men as they do for women.

You must always keep in mind that many of the signs of cheating can be attributed to something else. Your spouse could be in some difficulty at work, there could be financial problems that you are unaware of, or he or she may have some family problem that they don’t want to discuss. But, if you suspect that it is something else, here is how to tell if your spouse is cheating.

1. In the beginning, if your spouse is cheating, he or she may actually be more affectionate and pay more attention to you because of feelings of guilt .

2. Cheating spouses may have a change in sexual habits, more sex, less sex or unexplained sexual requests. Sex may not last as long, men may have trouble in keeping an erection and women may fake orgasm to get it over with.

3. Their wardrobe may change. Your spouse may buy new clothes in a style that may be different than usual. They may start to wear a new perfume or cologne, or change their style of underwear.

4. Check the cell phone, look at the contacts and check the numbers in the favorites list. Write down any strange numbers you find. If you can’t get access to his cell phone get a hold of the statement, that will have a list of all the numbers, dates and times of any calls made that month.

5. Keep a close eye on the finances. Check over very carefully the bank and credit card statements. Look for hotel bills close to home, restaurant charges from places that you have never eaten at. Has your spouse been purchasing small gifts for members of the opposite sex that you have not received?

There are several advantages to spying on your spouse. First it is one of the only ways how to tell if your spouse is cheating on you. You will learn the truth. You can catch them in the act, it is the proof you are looking for. You could possibly even save your marriage/relationship. Your spouse has made a mistake and comes begging you to let him/her come back.

The disadvantages are: Trust, what if your spouse is loyal? They will know that you didn’t trust them and feel deeply betrayed. It could possibly even end your marriage/relationship. Your spouse may catch you spying and take steps to keep you from finding any evidence. And finally, the truth hurts, if you discover that your spouse is cheating. And always, if you are unsure of what to do, please consult a family lawyer or a professional investigator.

Please DO NOT let your spouse keep on with their cheating ways, to obtain more information and resources to help you catch your cheating spouse in the act of cheating on you and finally know the truth visit:
http://www.howtotellifyourspouseischeating.com/

One of the most common questions facing marital partners today is the question of whether their spouse is cheating. Many women and men choose to remain in a state of denial, afraid to learn the truth and bear the pain.

I am here to tell you that there is good news even if you find out that your husband or wife is cheating on you. The good news is that if you have proof of a cheating spouse you then can make a decision of whether you want to save your marriage.

If you want to save your marriage, the quicker you have the facts, the quicker you can take action to resolve the issues that are at the root cause of the cheating by your spouse and repair the damage. If you choose to end the marriage you will have ample reason to make that decision, painful that it is.

With the thought in mind that your decision is to “save my marriage”, we should take a look at the telltale signs of infidelity by a spouse.

Men and women alike send out signals of cheating in a marriage that marriage counselors see on a regular basis.

Here’s a few signs-

• Your spouse has a “sudden “ change in sexual proclivities or interests. They want to experiment with new sexual activities.

• The cheating spouse withdraws emotionally and /or physically. Intimacy has gone out the window.

• The become combative and critical of you as to your appearance or needs.

• The cheating spouse becomes defensive about their whereabouts and activities.

• The cheating spouse comes home wearing a different outfit then they left home with

• The cheating spouse may buy a new fragrance or cologne and wear it frequently

• The cheating spouse may get a new hairstyle

• The cheating spouse may become more attentive to his or her appearance. He or she may join a gym or start dieting to wear the new outfits that suddenly appear in the bedroom closet.

• The cheating spouse may start working late, have to go on a business trip, or have other reasons to be away from the family more than normal.

• The cheating spouse may become upset if you are in ear shot of their phone conversation

• The cheating spouse may not take your cell phone calls or calls to their office or work

• The cheating spouse may have unusual charges for items on their credit card bill such as expensive restaurants, hotel or motel bills, or clothing or apparent gift item charges that you have not been the recipient of.

• A jewelry gift box or receipt may show up in the possession of a cheating spouse.

These are just a few of the myriad signs of a cheating spouse. Carefully assemble your information but don’t explode. Remember, your decision is to save your marriage.

A marriage counselor may be just what you need to help through this difficult time. Another option is to research the causes and resolution of problem relationship when a spouse cheats.

Your friends, well meaning that they may be, are not trained experts in relationships and should not be the source of advice at this critical time in you life.

To save you marriage you need a calm and clear plan to repair the damage and bring back the love and passion into your relationship. It can be done.

There are many qualified marriage counselors in every community. Make an appointment and get the help you need to save your marriage today.

When my marriage collapsed I made a vow to never let it happen again. If you want to save your marriage you need expert information. Get a free mini course and save your marriage today at http://www.savemymarriage.relationshipproblems-guru.com

How often do we see requests for friendship, or for lovers, in various advertisements, with the added desire that ‘no one should get hurt’. This mainly applies to men seeking temporary solace from their negative home situations who either lack the courage to address their problems and face the issues squarely, or wish to have their cake and eat it. In their eyes, they are free to do what they can to remedy their situation ‘as long as no one gets hurt’.

Often, people seek eternal liaisons with the misplaced belief that breaking up the union would harm everyone, except themself, it seems, and they have to protect that by pleasing themself instead. After all, they are the only ones who benefit from such a situation. But ignoring problems at home, which is the most important part of our lives, only makes the quality of our existence much worse. The answer to our problems is never outside. We merely take our needs elsewhere instead of seeing how it could be addressed internally through discussion, compromise and change.

The main problem with this approach is that, the minute the affair begins, the hurt is already there through the absence of trust and the deliberate betrayal of the other party. The lovers might not ever be found out, but the feelings we have for another do affect what is going on at home for that particular time. We either become more detached from our partners, less appreciative and less caring, or we become more affectionate to compensate for our outside activities. As soon as this new attention stops, there are also likely to be changes inside the home, and often for the worse, so that we continue to seek outside gratification to compensate, or the relationship deteriorates altogether.

Worse still, relationships seldom recover from external affairs which are discovered because trust is essentially destroyed. This leads to insecurity, resentment and continuous feelings of being unappealing and rejected by the offended party, along with a lot of guilt and negative feelings by the offender. The couple will limp along with the open secret between them, especially where one party is passive and accepts the situation, with or without conditions. But the offender will seldom change, unless he/she stands to lose a lot. This guarantees a repetition along with a gradual decline in the quality of the interaction and the feelings between them.

Once someone embarks on an affair, everyone gets hurt, even if it is not found out, because the quality of both the relationship and the feelings of the parties involved is affected, usually negatively. It keeps the party at home feeling neglected and unwanted, the one in the affair feeling guilty and the external party either feeling used in the end or with raised expectations of something more. Worse still, it never resolves the real issues and, if anything, is most likely to lead to the relationship disintegrating.

ELAINE SIHERA (Ms Cyprah - http://www.myspace.com/elaineone and http://www.elainesihera.co.uk) is an expert author, public speaker, media contributor and columnist. The first Black graduate of the OU and a post-graduate of Cambridge University. Elaine is a CONFIDENCE guru and a consultant for Diversity Management, Personal Empowerment and Relationships. Author of: 10 Easy Steps to Growing Older Disgracefully; 10 Easy Steps to Finding Your Ideal Soulmate!; Money, Sex & Compromise and Managing the Diversity Maze, among others (available on http://www.amazon.co.uk as well as her personal website). Also the founder of the British Diversity Awards and the Windrush Men and Women of the Year Achievement Awards. She describes herself as, “Fit, Fabulous, Over-fifty and Ready to Fly!”

Often one hears men, particularly celebrities or those in the public eye (British Prime Minister John Major and his mistress Edwina Currie come to mind), when their affairs are outed, bemoaning what a mistake it was (always the men, for this one!) and how mad they must have been to have that affair. But that is such nonsense, when taken with hindsight, as well as being most derogatory and insulting to the women involved. It is a futile exercise comparing feelings across time. No one ever makes a mistake in their choice of partners. Our choices are dictated by that essential moment in time, the way we felt then, even if they are not appropriate now. Regardless of the options we had before us, that final choice was the only one we felt capable of accepting at that single moment, for whatever reason.

We are constantly seeking happiness through personal reinforcement, affirmation, significance and value because our overriding need in life is to be accepted and wanted. Our parents and partners usually provide that for us. When it is missing through a lack of attraction, being taken for granted, being ignored or simply falling out of love, we seek it elsewhere. Our actions are always dictated by one primary factor the way we FEEL at that moment in time. Feelings and emotions control us and that is why, no matter how upright and conservative we are in actions, alcohol releases our inhibitions and the feelings we try to suppress. If we are feeling down, isolated, unloved and excluded we are likely to behave in an entirely different manner, more negative and selfish, than if we feel wanted, uplifted, loved and appreciated. Therefore apologising for behaving badly is pointless because that represents the negative side of our character. We cannot apologise for who we are. The best thing is to learn from it and move on. Otherwise apologies and regrets become substitutes for the continuing bad behaviour. We can always apologise, which then makes it right!

No affair is ever a mistake because it was the choice of that moment to improve our feelings, whatever they were at the time. What happened then might not be the right thing for now, three or five years on, when times and feelings have progressed, but the decision we make at any point regarding the involvement of others is always the appropriate one for that precise moment because of our evolution. If we could have behaved differently then, we most certainly would have done so, and that is a point worth stressing. Very few people act without reason or need. Regret comes only when our mood and situation have changed, or we lost something valuable in the process, then we use hindsight, and the mood and experience of today, to judge the inadequacy, immaturity or momentary madness of yesterday.

Learning from the Situation

Most importantly, the consequences of the choices we make, whether positive or negative, help to shape our individual development and experience. It is thus pointless living in a land of regret, beating ourselves over the head because of unplanned detours we made in our lives. We cannot make excuses for past action we cannot change, because the very act of behaving in that manner will have actually influenced and shaped the person we have become.

Furthermore, that relationship was probably necessary to get the two parties involved through a difficult period of their life; to reinforce them as valued people and to clarify the issues around them. Having benefited from it and moved on, the relationship cannot then be viewed as a mistake! It was a crucial part of defining the people involved, the situation they were in, the pressing needs they had and where they both wanted to go. If they are not too happy with the outcome, the best they can do is to learn from it and avoid a repetition, but it will still have added to, or even changed, their perspectives on life for the better. The least they would have learned is that an affair is never the answer to resolving a problematic relationship.

No experience in our life is ever wasted and every direction we take is part of our natural development. If you steal as a child because of a dare with friends, or it was easy to do, it is pointless berating yourself for that act 20 years later when you are more mature and knowledgeable about life and when those acts of deviance with your peers helped to reinforce you then and make you into the character you are now. Regrets do nothing but diminsh our esteem and induce self-doubt. However, acknowledging those actions as stages in our evolution and development, and using them as learning tools to improve the quality of our life and interaction with others, will make the biggest difference to our journey.

ELAINE SIHERA (Ms Cyprah - http://www.myspace.com/elaineone and http://www.elainesihera.co.uk) is an expert author, public speaker, media contributor and columnist. The first Black graduate of the OU and a post-graduate of Cambridge University. Elaine is a CONFIDENCE guru and a consultant for Diversity Management, Personal Empowerment and Relationships. Author of: 10 Easy Steps to Growing Older Disgracefully; 10 Easy Steps to Finding Your Ideal Soulmate!; Money, Sex & Compromise and Managing the Diversity Maze, among others (available on http://www.amazon.co.uk as well as her personal website). Also the founder of the British Diversity Awards and the Windrush Men and Women of the Year Achievement Awards. She describes herself as, “Fit, Fabulous, Over-fifty and Ready to Fly!”

Guys, do you suspect your wife of cheating on you? One study reported that 53% of women admitted cheating on their husbands, so it’s not just a paranoid fantasy. It can and does happen, but how do you know if it’s happening to you? At the risk of being a traitor to the sisterhood, here are 9 signs that your wife may be cheating on you.

1) You find birth-control pills in her medicine cabinet, and you’ve had a vasectomy. Is your wife is a pack rat who never throws anything out? If they’re left over from before your vasectomy, relax, but, if she bought them last week…

2) She sets up a new e-mail account and doesn’t tell you about it. Of course, you’d have to be fairly sneaky to discover this. If she’s also smart enough to delete her cookies and browsing history, you’re probably out of luck. Ditto, if she only uses the account at work.

3) She goes to the store for groceries and comes home 5 hours later. If it’s the day before Thanksgiving or the Super Bowl, give her a break. Otherwise, if she takes 5 hours to shop for groceries, she’d better be bringing home some good stuff.

4) She buys herself new underwear. Was underwear on sale? Did she buy you some new underwear too? If she hasn’t worn her new underwear for you, she may be wearing it for someone else.

5) She sets up a separate cell phone account that is billed to her office. Good luck discovering this, but she might get careless and call you on her “secret” cell phone one day.

6) The toilet bowl seat is up, and when you left home it was down. Were you expecting the plumber? If you weren’t, some other man was in the house because ladies NEVER leave the toilet bowl seat up.

7) She’s unconventionally spending money on new clothes. Women buy new clothes to make themselves feel better and to make themselves look better. Either way, there may be a problem.

She stops confiding in you and seeking advice from you. How many years did it take you to notice this? The more years, the more likely that she has found someone else to confide in and seek advice from.

9) She stops wearing her wedding ring. Being in a relationship proves that she’s a real woman, and her wedding ring is free advertisement. Not wearing her wedding ring says one of two things: she’s trying to indicate that she’s available for a relationship, or she’s trying to forget that she’s already in one. Neither is good for your marriage.

Surveys of women report that only 20% of women have affairs for sex; most have affairs for emotional reasons. If your lady is straying, it’s probably not because of what’s happening in the bedroom. It’s because of what’s happening (or not happening) outside it. If want to save your marriage, it means that YOU are probably going to have to change. Are you ready for that?

Jennifer Lawless writes about developing health relationships at her blog Relationship Health. To find out the single biggest mistake you can make when you think your wife is having an affair, visit her website Astonishing Discoveries

Are you worried that your spouse may be cheating on you? Since one study reported that 53% of women and 59% of men admitted cheating on their spouses, it’s not at all unreasonable to be concerned. The question is do you have any reason to be concerned? What are some of the signs of a cheating spouse?

1) He/she shows a sudden interest in a different type of music. What are the chances that a lifelong country music fan is going to suddenly start listening to hip-hop or classical music? Close to zero, I’d say.

2) Your spouse’s co-workers are uncomfortable in your presence. They’re caught in the position of either betraying a co-worker, or being blamed later if you find out that they knew what was going on and didn’t tell you. No wonder they’re uncomfortable.

3) He/she has a sudden preoccupation with his or her appearance. When are males and females most preoccupied with their appearance? When they’re trying to attract a mate or sexual partner, right?

4) Your spouse spends an excessive amount of time on the computer when you are asleep. Of course, how would you know? You’re asleep.

5) The amount of money being deposited into your checking account drops off. Cheating can be expensive, especially for men, but even women need some new clothes and trips to the salon to carry on an affair with style. Unless your spouse just got fired or laid off, that missing money is being spent on something.

6) You find items of intimate apparel that you did not give your spouse. Only intimate partners give intimate apparel, and, if it wasn’t you, it must be someone else.

7) Your spouse seems less comfortable around you and is “touchy.” Whether because of a guilty conscience or a misplaced loyalty to their new “sweetie,” cheating spouses often become uncomfortable around the spouse they’re cheating on.

You get calls where the caller hangs up when he or she hears your voice. It could be a wrong number, but, if it happens again and again…

9) He/she has a definite change in attitude towards everyone in the home. Everyone is a potential snitch, so he/she has to be guarded with all family members. Plus, your cheating spouse may be thinking about the possibility of a new home, which could cause a change in attitude towards the old one.

10) Your spouse uses a low voice or whisper on the phone or hangs up quickly. Your spouse might be planning a surprise birthday party for you, but, if not, what is your spouse trying to hide?

11) He/she begins to delete all incoming phone calls from the caller ID. Everyone knows about reverse lookup by now.

12) Your spouse deletes all incoming e-mails when they used to accumulate. It’s sort of creepy to read other people’s e-mail, but, if your spouse didn’t care about it before, why the sudden change?

13) He/she picks fights in order to stomp out of the house. This has the double benefit of not only getting cheating spouses out of the house, but they also get to justify their cheating to themselves because you’re a bastard/bitch.

If your spouse only shows one of the signs, you may have nothing to worry about, but it’s never just one, is it? If your spouse is doing any one of these things, he/she is probably doing several, which brings up the big question: what do you do next? Do you confront, investigate, or ignore? The choice you make will change your life.

Jennifer Lawless writes about developing health relationships at her blog Relationship Health. To find out the single biggest mistake you can make when you think your spouse is having an affair, visit her website Astonishing Discoveries

Why do people have affairs? No one has all of the answers to this question but one thing is certain, affairs cause massive pain, destroy relationships and break apart families. There are many different reasons people say they have affairs, though none are justified. The loss of trust, respect, and admiration, in addition to the emotional trauma it creates can be devastating for the people involved and the relationship.

In my experience with coaching couples, there seem to be two major reasons why people choose to have affairs. Note that I use the word choose, as it is a person’s conscious choice to break their commitment to their partner and engage in an affair. The person committing the act of infidelity has no excuses, is not a victim, and must accept absolute personal responsibility for all of their words, behaviors, and decisions.

Let’s face it, some people for whatever reason are not considerate individuals. They think of themselves first with little or no regard for the consequences of their words, behaviors, and decisions on the ones they love. We all have our own special names for these kinds of people; I will be gracious and say they belong with the rotten apples in the barrel bunch.

The second reason, and the one I will focus one, lies with the relationship space. This is the space both partners create that breeds the conditions for affairs to happen. Allow me to state again, I do not condone infidelity and it is my belief that affairs are never justified. This explanation is not an excuse for people to use to rationalize or justify the choices they make. My contention is that while couples do create the environment for infidelity to occur, the choice to engage in an affair is a poor solution to a relationship problem.

The question remains, how can partners create a relationship space that is resistant to affairs? To begin, people must understand that in order to keep their home standing, they must first build a solid foundation. The foundation is reflected in feeling Safe, Loved, and Cared For (SLC). In order to achieve the feelings of SLC people must follow three steps to understand, learn, and speak each other’s SLC Language.

Everyone has their own unique dictionary for the meaning of SLC. Each person’s dictionary is comprised of the words, actions and behaviors they need to see, hear and feel in order to know they are safe, loved, and card for.

If a person does not feel SLC in a relationship, their perspective of their partner and the relationship overall will undoubtedly be negative. Negative perspectives lead to feelings of disconnection, apathy, and loneliness in the relationship. As time goes on, the feelings of disappointment, frustration, defensiveness, resentment, contempt and anger are injected into the relationship space. These couples will eventually find themselves destroying the foundation of their relationship while mired in the Cycle of Conflict.

In order to prevent the negative spiral that leads to affairs and infidelity, couples must follow the three steps to speak each others SLC Language thus ensuring a rock solid foundation to build a relationship filled with safety, friendship, trust, respect, admiration, joy, passion, and love.

Step 1 - Write your definition for each of the following. If you are uncertain what your definition is, how do you expect your partner to speak your language? What does each word mean to you? How to do need to see it, hear it, feel it, touch it, experience it? Write a minimum of three words, actions, and behaviors that help you to feel each of the following …

• Safe
• Loved
• Card for

Step 2 - Once you complete your list, share it with your partner. Remember, your partner is not a mind reader. If people desire their partner to speak their SLC language fluently and often, they must teach it in a manner that helps their partner feel safe enough to learn it. Take this opportunity to be patient and gently coach your partner in the finer points of your language of SLC.

• Bo concise and explain each definition in detail
• Make sure to write down all of your partners definitions to review.
• Read the list of your partners SLC language once a day for 10 days

Step 3 – After you share your SLC language with your partner, commit to learning, memorizing and speaking each other’s language every day. Have fun exploring and sharing new words, actions, and behaviors in your partner’s dictionary.

• Commit to your partner that you will speak their SLC language everyday
• Speak your partner’s language unselfishly and unconditionally, regardless of what your partner does or does not do.
• Each time you speak your partner’s SLC language,. you are creating the environment where your relationship will be free of the fear of infidelity.

The choice is yours ! You can accept personal responsibility to work together and co-create an emotionally intelligent relationship where you both feel Safe, Loved, and Cared. for, or you can allow the seeds of disappointment, frustration, defensiveness, resentment, contempt, and anger to take hold and potentially lead to infidelity and affairs.

P.S. - Please do not pour concrete, then take a jackhammer and break it up. The quickest way to accomplish this is by NOT following The “I-TO-WE” Creed - Nothing destroys the safety, friendship, trust, respect, admiration, joy, passion, or love in a relationship more than having someone make a promise, or commitment to you and your relationship, and then not follow through.

©2007 – All rights reserved – Glenn Cohen - “I-TO-WE”™ Relationship Coaching / www.i-to-we-relationship-coaching.com

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Married women have always been portrayed as the loving wife and the caring mother. However, there are some who have taken on a different path. Some have taken the road to infidelity.

Today, there are many stories of a wife cheating on her husband. Most of the experts on this field can claim that the incidence of cheating among married women has considerably increased.

A Cheating Wife

A married woman who becomes too unhappy in her situation can turn into a cheating wife. This unhappiness can have different reasons but it can be rooted on the fact that the husband ignores the needs and desires of the wife.

Husbands continue to be the main bread winners in the family. Thus, they usually spend most of their time working to earn more money. They get too busy and too engrossed in their duties at work that they forget their duties at home.

It is possible that there is no more time spent with the wife and the kids. If the husband continues to be absent and remiss of his duties to the wife, then it can lead to the unhappy situation of cheating.

The cheating wife can resent this fact of being ignored by the husband. Out of spite, she can look for other men to make her happy. She can even seek a lover just to make her husband jealous.

How Does a Cheating Wife Get Around?

Most people wonder if the wife can really cheat her husband. Is it really possible for her to do so?

Married women can take on various means and methods just to accomplish something that she wants. A housewife can especially find more time to cheat, especially if there is nothing much to do inside the house.

A cheating wife can use her free time to take on a little adventure. She can go out in the afternoon to meet someone and return just in time to prepare for dinner. Some can even pretend to be attending yoga sessions or dancing classes.

She can even use the need to go shopping for grocery to make it appear that she takes on household work, but she can make detours along the way.

The cheating wife can even go as low as using her own kids as an excuse. She can pretend to be waiting for the kids to finish their classes when she will merely meet with a lover.

All of these adventures will of course require some good amount of finances. The cheating wife can have a lover who will take care of all the expenses. The cheating wife can even use the funds of the husband to finance her expeditions.

The Dilemmas Brought by the Cheating Wife

Cheating does more than just hurting the husband and the wife. It could hurt the whole family, especially the kids. Most husbands will not forgive this infidelity of the wife. Thus, it could lead to estrangement and separation.

The relationships with the relatives and friends can also be damaged. In some instances, the cheating wife can go after the best friend or brother of the husband. These cases are more complicated and they tend to get messy.

Thus, it is very important to address any problem in the relationship of the couple as early as possible.

Avoiding the Possibility of a Cheating Wife.

There are many reasons why a wife may learn to cheat. However, it will all boil down to how well the relationship between the couple is maintained.

Women do not become cheaters just overnight. There will always be things that will push her in that situation. As such, it is best to know the signs and address them right away.

What is needed is for the husband to determine if a problem exists. Some even go to the extent of hiring spies. However, all it needs is to get to know the wife more.

Have an open communication with the wife. Talk constantly. Listen whenever she has something to say. Take her out on a date every now and then. Be creative in your relationship so that the wife will feel loved and special.

Conclusion

Nobody wants to have a cheating wife. Everyone deserves a good family and relationship. Thus, before things get worse, make sure that you know well how to know if the wife is cheating and be sure to address the situation.

Mark started How To Catch a Cheating Wife on the 7/10/05. A very good friend of He’s asked if he could look up cheating wives on the net, at the time Adam didn’t have a PC.

He said Kris (Adam’s Wife) was not quite being her self for the last 6 months.

Mark surfed the net looking through the Search Engines for away to help Adam, being a good friend of he’s.

Turned out Adam’s wife was cheating with his daughter’s friends Mum. “Wow”

Adam never ever would have guest. So there you go, always trust your instincts.
Visit: How to catch Cheating Wifes